Again

once again

i find myself lost,

lost in the eyes of a man

who does not love me back

once again

i find myself lost,

lost in spaces that i can

no longer go to

…lest the thought of you occurs

no longer can i sleep

for the fear of losing you

rips me apart from the inside out

but my poor mind…

my poor heart…

fails to see that

i could never lose you,

when you were never mine to begin with

once again,

i find myself

lending my body

to fill the empty void in his heart

once again,

i find myself

unable to keep him

in my arms.

I wish this was a dream

I hate this

The way you make me feel 

It’s short and sweet

But I forgot

This was a deal

Now I hate it

I see you with them

And not with me

In a dream

I wish to be

I can not

Feel

I hate this 

And how she takes up

Your mind

Even with me 

It was short and sweet

Now I hate this 

Like I can’t keep 

You

In a dream 

I wish to be 

So I can not

Feel

in waves

reach out with empty hands

my skin divides,

at your command

parting words,

they’re on your mind

fall down, get up

in cycles like seasons

we’ve all lost our way

shout away

in constant fear

you’re safe

if you can heal

shout away

they cannot hear

you’re mind

it cannot heal

stranger in the light

like cold,

winter air

this life,

is all but fair

fall down, fall down.

Round Again

the children run, waving their invisibile guns

up in the air

a breeze warm, inviting

i remember the arms of my grandmother

as she wiped the tears off my face

the trees darken with approaching night

and a subtle pink, brings my mind around again

to the faint memory of a similar sky

and the sharp wind kissing our skin

i wish she could hold me now.